Is it me?

Wow.

Lemme spin you a yarn.

I am starting to get a bit disappointed in my fellow indie filmmakers. Being a fan of story-driven films I ordered “I Am Love” on PPV the other night. Wow. What ever happened to storytelling. You know…introduce the characters, put them in a situation, get them out of the situation.

I stuck with “I Am Love” just because IT WAS SO BAD. I went to Rama’s Screen to see what some other film aficionados had to say. Here’s Chris Terry’s summation:

chris terry says:

“I Am Love” – it beats me how anyone can be so taken in by this ridiculous movie. An overwrought, overblown, overdressed chunk of soap without a scintilla of emotional truth in either its performances or its cinematography. I cannot blame poor John Adams’ music because it was not scored for the film, but I do feel for him as he surely winces at the way his compositions are turned to the service of such shallow self-indulgence. I Am Love is long, self-regarding, plodding, predictable, and obvious. You’d need a heart of stone not to laugh at the silly sex scene with its astonishing parade of visual and musical cliches. Ditto the ridiculous ending, except by then one is too exhausted by this film’s horrible combination of monumental pretension and sheer unremitting banality. Art with a great big capital A like this, almost always ends up being just fake.

Watch out for them bees

Yeah….the love-scene-in-the-field, with the 5 minute Bees pollinating the flowers montage, Jeez’…come on…gimmee a break.  Plus the entire film was somehow connected to a bowl of soup.  Kinda like the ‘Soup Nazi’ meets Ingmar Bergman.

No soup for YOU!

Then what’s all this film school hoo-hah with the obligatory staircase shot? If I am forced to see another one of these I’m gonna fling myself over the railing and simply be done with it.

OK...you went to film school.

 

So, the solution? I flip around my overpriced premium channels and opt for a HWood Blockbuster. Sherlock Holmes with Jude Law and Robert Downey, Jr…. No good. More film school, “I’m-gonna-impress-you-with-my-technique” shit. Yeah, yeah…slo-mo, drop-frame, time-shift, blah-blah-blah.

WTF! I wanted to do this to the filmmaker.

What’s the friggin story about?!?

Anyway….I bailed out.

Wound up reading a book.

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Filed under Film, Film Financing

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